Magic Phone Numbers, or, Jumping Through Hoops for Verizon

We moved into our new house over the weekend, and I’m beat. More about the house as we get unpacked and settled. Our DSL isn’t going to be ready until the 29th, according to Verizon (no idea why so long), so I’m on a semi-flaky “borrowed” open Linksys wireless network. Thanks to whichever one of my neighbors is providing it. I won’t abuse it – just checking mail occasionally.

The reason I’m posting is that I’m on hold with Verizon for about the fifth time this morning regarding our phone line to the house. I called them a couple of weeks ago, to tell them that we were moving. They said the old line would be turned off on the 16th (it was) and the new one would be active withing 24 hours (it wasn’t).

Anytime I tried to make an outgoing call, I got a message about calling their Express Dialtone service number (483). Of course, they weren’t open during the weekend, so I called them this morning. After getting transfered because “something is weird in our system on this order” (no kidding), I was told to follow the most absurd set of tech support steps I’ve ever heard.

I was told that my line was some kind of virtual line, and that I had to call a “magical” number “out there in cyberspace” (958-1114) that would tell me another number. Then I had to write that number down, call back into the 483 service number, as to be transferred back to the department I was speaking to, and tell them that number. Once I returned from this scavenger hunt, they would be able to activate my line.

I could hardly believe what I was hearing. I asked why in the world I had to go through with this wild goose chase just to get my phone service activated. I got some lame story about it being much simpler this way. Yeah, right. Is there no way that they could get the number that the “magical number” was going to give me, and save me the trouble?

When they asked me if there was anything else they could do, I told them to freaking simplify their system so that the next poor sap like me didn’t have to jump through these senseless hoops. Somehow I don’t think that’s going to happen…


3 thoughts on “Magic Phone Numbers, or, Jumping Through Hoops for Verizon

  1. Pingback: desparoz On The Go

  2. fyi, 958 (number chekc) has been around for a long time. not magic. i use to use it all the time when wiring telephones around the house/office. been around long before caller id. it is very handy at times. these POTS networks are not as intelligent as we suppose them to be. nothing surprises me about verizon… i had a business DSL line go down for 5 days.

    more info on 958 numbers:

    no internet access via tethered cell?

    great blog.


  3. Pingback: » Verizon Customer Hoops, Part Deux

Comments are closed.