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Verizon Customer Hoops, Part Deux

I finally got the issue with our home phone line straightened out with Verizon. Turns out there are two lines in our house, and one of them had, in fact, been activated. It just wasn’t the main one on the first floor that we are using.

But, today, I had another ridiculous experience with them trying to place an order for high-speed “Fios” fiber-optic broadband (15Mbps down, 2Mbps up, $39.99/month).

Even though previous attempts to check by address had been fruitless, just for kicks I decided to check and see if our new phone number qualified for Fios, since they’ve been rolling it out in Washington county. Sure enough, it was available. Whee! However, a few steps into the online order process, I got a page that said something to the effect of “We’re sorry, our system is broken. Please call this number to continue your order via phone.”

Of course, calling that number leads you straight into the lair of the Verizon Interactive Voice Response system. “Briefly say what I can help you with, and I’ll direct you to the right system”. Yeah, right. After repeatedly stating that I wanted to order Fios fiber broadband, it finally said it was going to connect me to the correct department. When I finally got to a live human being, it was the Collections department. When I explained that I had been misrouted by the oh-so-friendly-sounding-but-apparently-incompetent-voice-system, the guy told me I was the third person in a row that happened to, and he would route me to the right place.

Silly, gullible me.

Back into the Voice Response system I go, and after a few more exasperated minutes of trying to tell a computer what I wanted to do, I ended up speaking with the Collections department again. Thankfully, they were able to transfer me directly to a real person in the Fios orders department the second time, but I’m beginning to get the feeling that Verizon is secretly monitoring all of my phone calls, and having a laugh every time they get me to curse under my breath at the hoops I have to jump through just to get something done with them.

On the bright side, I should have high-speed fiber optic broadband in about a week and a half. I wonder what tricks I’m going to have to perform for the technician when he comes out to install the Optical Network Terminal and wiring. I really hope it doesn’t involve taking off my clothes… 😉

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